Reading

Reading books is a very good habit that one needs to develop. It's amazing how much one can accomplish by reading for a few minutes before bed time. I am trying to inculcate the habit as well.

Books allow us to see the world from the authors perspective. It's a privilege to get into someone else's head for a certain period of time. It allows us to escape our own lives and live someone else's.

This is the second year I have set a reading goal for myself. And I'm very happy that I am on track!

War

I am currently reading a book about genocide in Darfur.

It's sad to see war destroy entire villages. Especially a war perpetrated by the government against it's own people. One man's greed for oil, water, metal and diamonds can make millions of men suffer.

Something that stuck with me, was how the author described himself - soul less and dead inside. It's hard to fathom what that feels like but I guess, when you see your family destroyed right in front of you, it's possible.

An interesting learning was that the author's last name "Hari" means eagle in Afrikaan. I couldn't help wonder if there was some cultural connection to Hindu "Hari" meaning Lord Vishnu whose vehicle is "Garuda", an eagle.

It's possible there is no connection at all but it's always better to be looking for similarities than otherwise. Unfortunately, hatred sells..not love.

Religion

I think the purpose of all religions is to keep our inner demons in check. It's ironic that man chooses to ignore that very purpose in the name of God.

Mental Health

Deepika Padukone recently spoke about her struggle with anxiety and depression. I thought that was very brave of her and about time we focus on mental illnesses.

I always associated depression and anxiety with people that were going through difficult phases in life (struggles in career, loss of a loved one etc). I found it hard to believe that someone that had everything..literally everything...would be a victim. Her struggle found resonance with me because I went through something similar very recently.

I was blessed with a baby boy in 2014. Although it's a moment of great joy for any family, it's tough being a mom especially in the first few months. Apart the crazy hormonal stuff the body is going through, the sleepless nights and breast feeding suck out every ounce of energy left.  I couldn't help but wonder when my life went from being simple to difficult.

When I had to go back to work, my extremely stressful work life made me miserable. I wasn't getting anywhere in my career by staying in a job that made unhappy and I wasn't spending enough time with the baby.
After a few months of thinking, I finally made the decision to leave my job and take a break.

It was a very difficult decision to come to since I always thought of myself as career-driven. I realized that in my entire life, I have never taken a break to enjoy what I accomplished. It has always been about moving on to the next goal. I decided to stop being so tough on myself. I decided to make 'me' a priority for myself. I was fortunate enough to have friends and family that supported me!

I am content and happier these days. And thank God for it!






I think I made a good decision but I guess that's for time to tell. 

The joy of travel

"Travel is the only thing you can buy that makes you richer" - Anonymous.

To me, the lure of travel is irresistable. It's wonderful to be able to see nature in all it's glory, experience different cultures, people and food. It gives a chance to see how the different cultures approach life. In turn, it helps shape our perpective on life and it's priorities.

I've was fortunate enough to have lived in India and the States and see a little bit of Europe. I've been to the following places:

• Puerto Rico (San Juan, Vieques)
• California (San Diego, LA, SFO, Malibu, Santa Barbara, drove along the PCH)
• New York (NYC) 
• Florida (Miami, South Beach, Key West)
• Netherlands (Amsterdam, Zaanse Schaans)
• Turkey (Istanbul)

There's so much to still see.

Here is my list of things to see in the next 5 years.

• Grand Canyon
• Yosemite and Yellowstone National Parks
• Rio de Janeiro
• Kerala
• Bali, Indonesia
• French Riveria
• Greece

I am sure I can think of atleast  few more but these definitely top the list. Let's see how many of these I cross off my list.
 

Friendship decoded

When I was a kid, I used to hear people say that true friends are really hard to find. I used to wonder why..!
I had a lot of friends in school and later on, college. I had a 'gang' and to me they meant the world. I knew everybody inside out. I am a leo and therefore fiercely loyal. I expected nothing less from the people I called friends.

I was too naive to understand the true meaning of friendship..too young to understand that every relationship is complicated and needs effort in order to be maintained.

The first time I realized this was when I was around 24.

I had just graduated with a Masters degree.  I was looking for a job during the financial meltdown which was obviously very stressful. I was in the States on a visa so I needed a job pretty quickly or I would have to leave the country. This caused me immense stress at that time because I equated going back home empty handed to being a loser. I was determined not to be one. 

During all this I knew I could count on one thing. My friends. I knew they would always be there for me. They were, afterall, my extended family.

Needless to say, my bubble was burst pretty quickly. People had moved on..they either had jobs, or girlfriends or other more important friends. I was told I wasn't trying hard enough to find a job, I had no interview skills and essentially that I needed to grow up and get a life.

I don't think I can accurately describe the pain I went through during this period. It had me questioning my belief that people were inherently nice. I felt like an idiot for not having realized their true colors.

I am not lying the blame squarely on others. I know I can be pretty rough in the way I say things when I am mad. I can be pretty honest and not everyone takes kindly to it. But aren't friends supposed to love you despite all that?

With a few people I made a lot of effort. I called them every week in the hope that may be, just may be, they will realize that I still care about them. And may be someday we can again share a cordial relationship. My calls, most of the time, were never answered. I would always hear excuses about how busy they are. After a few years, I finally gave up. I had endured enough heartbreak. It's time to stop hurting myself.

All this has only made me realize how much I should cherish the friends I still have left. I don't see them or talk to them everyday but I know they are just a message away. I cherish that. I've realized it's not easy to find people that a) have common sense b) know and like you (inspite of you being you) c) that I can have a conversation with  d) are there for you.

It's about time I thanked them.
Vinod, Sarvani, Savitha, Keerthi, Swapna and Murali - thank you!

I hope life does not screw up what we have! Amen!!


 

How true!

All that is gold does not glitter
Not all those wander are lost
The old that is strong does wither
Deep roots are not reached by the frost

Source: Lord of the rings Book 1

Absolutely beautiful isn't it!